The Ramadan Muslimah
You will have to forgive me but if this article had not made it to this lovely site; it might have ended up on the Sunday paper which would have been a whole lot more embarrassing for us. I have decided that, even though it’s the holy months and we ought to be focusing on the positive aspects of Muslim life, there are some people that are getting off too lightly with their ability to aggravate the well intended Ramadan of others. A good friend of mine once said
“Islam is the perfect religion sent to the most imperfect people.”
I thought he’d smoked the green herb and was prone to exaggeration. However, I am not ashamed to pitifully admit that my friend was, unfortunately right.
It was just last jumuah that I enthusiastically departed off to the masjid all eager to hear and learn about the virtues of our blessed month. I didn’t bother to hurry; I had never had a problem with parking space. So you can imagine my surprise when, behold, I nearly mistook our unadorned modest masjid for the local bazaar. People hung about everywhere; some where just standing around waiting for the adhan to go while they laughed away and brought their gossip up to date; others where somewhat moving into the masjid although if they walked any slower, they could have been moving backwards. yet others still where displaying various merchandise – scarves, tasbih’s, mussualas – and appeared to be attempting to barter it off to the laggards around them. You guessed it right: The Ramadan Muslims had come out in full swing. I am sure you know them well. The kind that are believers for 30 days of the year while for the remaining 335 they seem to be on a perpetual holiday from ibada.
SubhanaAllah! There was no parking. I drove around in circles and could not help but admire all the fancy cars I had often seen around the city, – parked mostly around nightclubs, restaurants and bars which astonishingly report record losses during this time of year – but never parked in this particular neighborhood. I ended up parking four blocks away and had to resort to a mild sprint back to the building in order to make it on time. I still had my ablution to make. While I consciously galloped away, I could not help but over hear the snide remarks:
“Does she not know she can’t run to the masjid? Astafirullah!”
Some whispered while others remarked,
“She must be one of these muslimahs who only shows up here during this blessed month. Agg shame.”
I could have stopped, turned back to them and pointed out that one can’t pray in transparent scarves, sleeves and pants; or kindly informed them that a Minie Mouse hijab was far more unacceptable than running to the masjid but I resolved to keep on going. After all, there must be some sawab for ignoring ignorant people. I entered the building and quickly made my way up the stairs to the woman’s section. It was packed. No really, I don’t mean to dramatize things or to simply amuse you with my writing but it was like walking into a woman’s department store in which the Muslim women where the live mannequins on display. I have never seen so much, style, fashion, shoes, bags, scarves, make up and jewelry adorned on chatter boxes dolled up babes who happened to be blocking the way to the woodoo section.
I stood patiently in line while I watched sister after sister purify herself. My turn seemed to never come. In part, it had to do with the disorderly cue and lack of organization. But in reality, the procession never seemed to move because a lot of sister simply pushed in. They seemed to have forgotten the appropriate etiquette. Or perhaps they’d never known it in the first place. My patience, by then, was beginning to wear thin. I was, after all, deliberately starving myself.
At last, there was an empty stool on the far left hand corner. I did a wonder woman move and pounced upon the seat, rolled up my sleeves and grabbed what seemed to be the last piece of soap available. There was a loud grunt to my right and an authoritative voice grumbled
“I have never seen wodoo being made with soap before.”
Well, I had never seen HER in the masjid before either. But I kept my big mouth shut; after all there is no point on having the big guy upstairs invalidate my fast just because I could not hold my tongue.
The salaat was a mess. There simply was not sufficient space for the hundreds of muslimas who seemed to have materialized over night. There was a great deal of pushing, shoving and stepping on prettily manicured toes. Cell phones went on and off, throats coughed, noses sniffed and hijabs kept sliding on and off unaccustomed heads and shoulders only to be rapidly set back in place. I know by now you must think of me as an antagonist but I was glad when it was all over. As a wove my way back to my car I felt a sudden relief with the realization that as far as frantic jumuas went, I was one down with only three to go.
This is a guest post where the author prefers to remain anonymous.
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I think most people can relate to this experience! There are people I have never seen on campus before that I now see some nights in the JK…
Another reaon why women are ADVISED not to go to mosque.
Here is an interesting article in that regard –> http://tinyurl.com/n5pb6l
Very good points, but it doesn’t in any way detract from the need for Muslimaat to attend the masaajid in these times…they just need to be educated…
its a right we must reclaim!
Exactly Safiyyah. No where in the Qu’raan does it state muslimah are forbidden or shouldn’t make Salaah in Jamaat. I for one, would love to attend on Fridays, but alas anything north of Bosmont is a no go area. mores the pity!
I think many guys could also relate to this experience!
Here at Rhodes University, women were told that it is better that they pray in their rooms or at home – and those who come to the Musjid to break fast, were told not to join the Jamaah and pray individually, even though the congregation is praying…
Do your homework boys. Women were “advised” not to go to mosque by one of the khalifs (Umar?) during a time when women were being attacked as they were walking to mosque.
If Allah and the Prophet (PBUH) didn’t want us at mosque, why would they give us instructions on where women should pray in the mosque?
This ridiculous feud is so upsetting. Go to the Middle East people, and observe how women and men go to mosque with their children each day.
Certain men need to get over themselves and accept that women have a right to sacred spaces too.
I was rather disappointed to read this, women were encouraged to go to mosque by the Prophet (SAW) and that ends all debate for me pretty quickly. The response sounds more like spiritual pride which is essentially a disease of the heart? I don’t think we should judge anyone’s intentions in coming to mosque, at least they are there, and something may spark in the hearts to return after Ramadaan insha Allah,we all have to start somewhere. Shouldn’t we be more tolerant of each other and try to have a good opinion of fellow muslims as the Prophet SAW taught us? We are supposed to make 70 excuses for our muslim brothers and sisters, insha Allah I hope the sister will try to do so next time.
@fuz – Umar did not like it, but I don’t think he outright forbade it:
Umar’s wife, Atika, would ask his permission to go to Masjid and he would remain silent. She would continue, “I swear I will go out unless you forbid me.” She used to go out for Isha and Fajr. She was asked once: “Why do you go out like that, knowing how jealous he is?” She replied: “And what prevents him from forbidding us?” Umar once said to her: “I swear that you know very well I dislike it.” She said: “By Allah! I shall not stop until you forbid me.” Umar replied: “I truly DO NOT forbid you.”
The day Umar was stabbed to death in the mosque, Atika was present.
When women are included in the mosque, you are opening the doors for the entire community to the teachings of Islam.
Regarding the question: Did the Commander of the Believers `Umar ibn al-Khattab – (RA) prevent women from attending the mosque? The answer is: Yes, but only those who stayed there for loitering/relaxation (istirwah), not those attending fard Salat.
`Umar himself narrated that the Prophet (PBUH) said more explicitly, “If your women ask permission to go out to Salat, do not forbid them!” Musnad Ahmad (1:40).
It is preferable for a woman to perform her salaat at home, BUT should she wish to read salaat at the masjid she should not be prevented from doing so. The following hadith confirm this.
“Do not prevent your women from going to the mosque, even though their houses are better for them.” (Reported by Abu Dawud)
“A woman’s prayer in her house is better than her prayer in her courtyard, and her prayer in her bedroom is better than her prayer in her house.” (Reported by Abu Dawud)
From ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Umar, who said: “I heard the Messenger of Allaah SAWS (Peace & Blessings of Allah be upon Him) say: ‘Do not prevent your women from going to the mosque if they ask your permission.’” Bilaal ibn ‘Abdullah said, “By Allaah, we will prevent them.” (Ibn ‘Umar) turned to him and told him off in an unprecedented fashion, saying: “I tell you what the Messenger of Allaah SAWS (Peace & Blessings of Allah be upon Him) said, and you say ‘By Allaah, we will prevent them’!!” (reported by Muslim, 667)
But there are conditions attached to the permission for women to go to the mosque, as follows:
(1) She should wear complete hijaab.
(2) She should not go out wearing perfume.
(3) She should have the permission of her husband.
Her going out should not involve any other kind of prohibited acts, such as being alone in a car with a non-mahram driver. If a woman does something wrong like that, her husband or guardian has the right to stop her; in fact it is his duty to do so.
I agree with Lightcubed. Whether a person visits the mosque during Ramadaan only or even only on Fridays, it is not up to any of us to judge that person. We are not privy to their intentions and therefore cannot adopt a holier-than-thou attitude. We should leave the judging to Allah (SWT).
If the writer of this article feels so strongly about the issues mentioned, then she should befriend those girls and set an example, whereby she explains to them the etiquette within the mosque, rather than lambasting their behaviour.
Purely a personal opinion but I think this whole men/women issue comes from a desi mentality where Men are supposed to go to the mosque and work on their relationship with their creator and women come closer to God by being obedient wives and serving their husbands needs. In this paradigm the woman is merely an object owned by the Man.
This idiotic mentality has bled through us completely.
At some point we need to understand that we are supposed to be a community and a Masjid should be the hub of our community.
In most desi communities Men have all the power, and as the essential gatekeepers of our communities I think it’s the responsibility of Men to create an environment where both sexes are able to worship in peace and harmony with their sisters and brothers, rather than making excuses and continuing to enforce cultural malformities.
In the UK I see that in Arab and Somali Mosques I have visited, families come to the mosque together to pray so I do think it’s a cultural thing rather than religious.
At the end of the day we will all stand before God alone whether you are Man or Woman so it is important that as sisters, brothers, husbands and wives we make effort to make this struggle to come closer to Allah easier for one another. One of the most important aspects of Islam is that of community and communal worship. We need to encourage this practice not discourage it because we really do need to work on strengthening our bonds with one another.
and I just realised this has nothing to do with the post.
further to my previous post I think this like so many debates within Islam in the 21st C is a question of idealism.
We have two equally valid opinions here. One that women should be allowed to the Mosque if they wish to attend, the other that Women should stay at home for various reasons.
The question is not one of pragmatism but of which ideal of Islam we aspire to follow.
Last night I went for Taraweeh here in Boston, USA with my husband.
It was one of my best Taraweeh experiences ever.
The mosque here does not have a proper wall segregating the women from the men, but they read quite a distance away from each other. Even without the erected wall, the two sexes remained respectfully away from each other, and actually LOWERED THEIR GAZE. Something I rarely see happening back in SA, when trying to get from the car to the Mosque.
I also enjoyed the fact that it was an interesting mix of ethnicity – Muslims from all backgrounds were reading their Salaah. No judging, no scrutinising, everyone greeting each other happily and even welcoming the newcomers.
I’ve found that these American Muslimah that follow the requirements of hijaab properly – sometimes they do not wear an abaya. Instead, a lot of them wear regular clothing, but they ensure that everything is loose, and covers everything. For some odd reason the way that these women dressed last night in regular clothing, not judging one another, made me very happy.
I wish that we could implement this back home in SA and go back to simplicity.
Copied from Mash’s blog:
I think it’s easy to blame the lack of access to a mosque on the “clear and obvious” misogyny us Asians have deeply embedded in our mentalities. I have yet to see a mosque which has no official ladies policy to turn one away; on the contrary space has been made each time my female friends ask for it. Okay – the numbers are small and the times infrequent, but I’d hardly call it repressive. Bear in mind that at least one caliph had the same attitude regarding having women in the mosque.
Personally I reckon that today it’s a policy and attitude driven mainly (and not fully) by practical reasons: that of space and resources. It’s just not practical to outfit a mosque for segregation if that facility is only used for 100 hours a year, especially if it means turning away men while that space remains empty (for whom prayer in congregation IS in fact more of an obligation than it is for women). I’d wager that the women’s sections in these Arab and Somali mosques are more subscribed to during normal days than the Asian ones with similar policies.
Perhaps these women who want this space (and the gallant men who ask for it on their behalf) should ask for it and if granted use it more often – not just on Fridays and for Ramadhan but for the other (arguably more important) five daily prayers too? This would make it more of a genuine request rather one driven by some kind of misplaced feminism and strive for equality? Do that and I reckon we’ll be sharing mosques in no time.
Some extra comment:
@Faz: the ME has more space and more of a logistical need for women’s spaces in the mosque. I long for the day where the mosque is the cross-gender community centre Mash talks about. Unfortunately, here in the UK anyway, it sometimes appears that women want space in a mosque as a way to assert or claim a right, rather than a place in which to pray. It’d be interesting to see (not literally of course) how many ladies perform jammat in their private lady groups while chilling at home, for instance. I also note how many baulk at the suggestion of going to a congregational tarawih prayer (”you stand for an hour? *faints*”), even though their local wholeheartedly welcome them to one.
Assalam Alaikum brothers and sisters in Islam
I think what this author is really getting at is these muslimahs (and muslims) who only practice the faith during ramadan; consquentialy they do it wrong. She seems to be stressing the point that there are no problems in her masjid during the rest of the year, only during these four specific weeks. Obviously, these are women who don’t normaly attend, perhaps they don’t even normaly pray. But sudenly, during ramadan they come out in their masses hence the name “ramadan muslims”. Additionaly, just because she has not focused specificaly on the men, does not mean she is not criticizing them as well; just look at the following sentence “There was no parking. I drove around in circles and could not help but admire all the fancy cars I had often seen around the city, – parked mostly around nightclubs, restaurants and bars which astonishingly report record losses during this time of year – but never parked in this particular neighborhood.” Yep, I think this is the real issue we ought to focus on.
Little Bird
SubhanAllah, Ramadan Muslims are not only women they are men as well who are also all decked up and pushing. Obviously, the sister who wrote the article could only write about the women because that’s the only thing she saw, to be fair… What goes behind the barriers onto the men’s sections, only men know…
There’s no hadeeth not no aya in the Qur’an that indicates that women shouldn’t go to the masjid. In matter of facts the Prophet (PBUH) encouraged it because, how on earth are we going to learn about Islam if the masjid is the place to learn?
There has been a documentary done about this issue and it’s sooooo sad… It’s done by a Muslim woman, zarqa Nawaz. The documentary is called, “Me and the Mosque”
I agree with what the documentary says and there were shoyookh and scholars in the documentary bringing evidence from the Sunnah and Islamic History that women were not only welcomed in the masjid but also were encouraged to participate.
Honestly, all of us need to reeducate ourselves with this amazingly perfect Deen called Islam, that teaches that women are the backbone of society and are of high status to the Prophet (PBUH) and Allah (SWT)… So why should we women accept otherwise what culture brings in that contradicts Islamic ethics.
Now that I mentioned that and got it off my chest, I have to say as much as this is sad to see our Ummah not understanding this deen fully, we need to stay positive and live our lives as examples for others….
Allah (SWT) is the most Merciful and he knows best. Honestly, before we worry about other people we need to see ourselves and improve ourselves so we can teach our next generation the proper understanding of Islam along with Islamic etiquette… We need to focus on the positives and have hope and spread hope…
Honestly, I can’t feel mad at these Ramadan Muslims. I rather feel sorry for them and I hope that Allah (SWT) will open their hearts and guide them. You’ll never know, maybe that one person you never saw at the masjid will become a regular after Ramadan. Only Allah knows what is in each one of our hearts… We can’t judge anybody…
Let’s all pray that Allah will guide all of us to be better Muslims and inshaAllah we’ll be able to rise this Ummah again…
I agree with Mariam – that the solution should be to try to speak to those sisters, rather than vent about them anonymously.
I think the writer did well in holding back her criticisms at the time – and insha-Allah that will be rewarded.
But reading this post reminded me of the recent bootcamp posts (on this site) – about pride.
We can hold our toungues – which is a good thing – but in our hearts, we still feel ‘better’ than the others. We feel ‘better’ than those who only show up 30 days a year. And that’s something we need to change inside – because it’s not OUR own doing, that we’d go to the masjid throughout the year. It’s not OUR own doing that we are ‘practicing’ Muslims throughout the year.
So, we shouldn’t look down on those who struggle through the rest of the year – whether they make an effort or not.
Because to do so would be pride. And we cannot be proud, because it’s such a dangerous attribute -one of those hidden diseases that shaitaan can use to mislead us in a subtle way; which can lead to major transgressions.
So, to the writer: thank you for posting what many people do think. Many people do judge our ‘Ramadaan Muslims.’ But, bear in mind that – just because you held back at the time – it doesn’t mean you should express it in words on the publicly – even if you are writing anonymously.
We all have pride in us, and we are all judgemental of others – to some degree or another. But one of our goals is to try to eradicate that pride.
I remember a Mufti Menk talk where he spoke about judgementalness and the faults of others. He said that we should not judge others – because they may be better than us (despite outward appearances). We should make dua for them, and for ourselves. And we should try to help them in a gentle way.
@Lightcubed, Mariam & Dreamlife -
I think all of you are wrong to judge the author of this post and accuse her of writing this with PRIDE! Think the best of your Muslim brother and sister – most others read this as an attempt to make people aware of the mistakes that many make and encourage some reflection.
Keeping quite and making dua for people is not the only appropriate action – and using humour and cynicism is a form of expression too:)
@Fatima – write a post about your experiences and submit please. If possible, get pics too!
We should expect, welcome and deal with the inevitable increase in mosque traffic during Ramadhan. Patronising comments like the above and labels like “Ramadhan Muslims” demonstrate an attitude that will probably repel those who are trying for this month (regardless of their level of practise in others) rather than help them.
On a recent visit to Indonesia on a program we were able to visit different mosques across the country. It truly was an eye opener on just how the mosque can be the centre that brings teh community together.
Men and women prayed together, sometimes in different sections or different floors but most of the time with a respectful distance between them. Friday prayers were certainly the best. Families came out together, everyone prayed, people greeting others, women rushing to hug other women, men with outstretched arms, kids laughing and playing. After the prayer, families would buy food from street vendors and sit outside the mosque and eat.
The atmosphere is of a united loving community where men and women are integral to the community.
Here in Australia the situation is not ideal but still we have many of the Ulema support the decision of women to attend the musjid.Alot of the problem comes from a lack of space more than anything else.
I am one of those Muslims who attends the mosque only in Ramadaan. We get a Qari from South Africa every year and it’s an awesome atmosphere at the mosque. I enjoy listening to the recitation and praying taraweeh in congregation. Having women from all walks of life, wearing such different clothes, speaking such different languages all coming together for the one purpose is just inspiring.
I think that the mosque does need to be reclaimed but not just for women but rather for the entire Muslim community.
i am just glad this post has generated this debate.
To be honest, i say if they are muslims for just 1 month in the year, thats still better then NOTHING at all.
What would you rather have, people not caring about fasting etc during ramadan? (I have seen this in Dubai, muslims who dont bother to fast), or people who actually make an effort? Even if it may not be with the best intentions.
/i
@Shak and Bilal:
I’m not saying the increase in traffic is a bad thing – on the contrary, it’s a good thing and it is to be expected.
And I’m not using that label (“Ramadhan Muslims”) to patronise those who only go in Ramadaan. I used that label because it was a quick reference phrase – something that a person would recognise instantly. (An alternative phrase could be “Seasonal Muslims” – as used by Baba Ali in season 1 of his “Reminders” video blog: http://www.ummahfilms.com/season1.html. Another recent one is “30 DAY MUSALLEE” – used at http://killa.co.za/blog/?p=440).
The reason I talked about that segment is because that’s what this post was about. I explained my view – which is that, the writer THOUGHT these things without saying them – which is to be applauded; but the THOUGHTs themselves – when expressed even in a different forum – could be problematic.
I was very careful NOT to accuse the writer of pride – i didn’t personalise it. I didn’t come out of nowhere and say she was being proud or arrogant.
you have to look at the context of where i came from: reading the recent bootcamp posts, which are on this exact topic of pride.
so, in putting that together with this post – it *seemed* to me that this situation (i.e. what she describes in the post), is one where pride could sneak up on you.
what i tried to do, in my reply, was talk about this SITUATION…not the PERSON (i.e. the writer).
i personally struggle with the issue of pride; and something in this post just resonated with me and i felt i had to air my view.
i didn’t mean to offend anyone and i definitely did not try to judge. I guess that’s just the way it came across to you.
Bismillah,
As I read the article, I kept thinking to myself while this sister may be right, she is also wrong. The feelings she felt are real, however, myself being a part-time Muslim once in my life would say, that the sisters who are practicing- Mash’Allaah- should be an example that the part-time Muslimah’s would want to follow. It is due to lack of knowledge that many of the Muslim women behave this way, out of ignorance, not becuase they choose to be. I always longed to be a better Muslimah, but not knowing how, or what was expected of me, I didn’t do it until I was 30 years old. Yes I know that is old, but there was no great example of a sister in the masjid who despise the way I dressed, and looked out of ignorance to come and be-friend me and say some kind words. Everyone would look at me as if I was wrong, which I was, but no one wanted to help correct me. A little advice for all the practing sisters, “What is Common Knowledge to you, isn’t so Common to everyone else.” Think about this next time you judge the sisters. Alhamdullilah, Allaah (SWT) guided me, but I will never forget how I used to be once, and I pray that I never judge anyone else, and always humble myself down. It is bad enough they judge, and they gossip, we need to be above that and be humble and try to befriend them and see if we can help them, inshAllaah. A true Muslimah is one who can see the faults of others, but sees her faults much more superior, and corrects herself first. A true Muslimah uses hikmah in any situation to make the best of it. A true Muslimah always smiles, and tries her best to please her Lord, by being kind, gracious, loving, and a sister regardless of how others are.
Your sister, Zohra
Just to add my 2-pence.
It has never seem odd to me, i have been going to mosque with my mom, for as long as I can remember, but to point out. If you ARE going to the mosque to be seen, then of course it detracts from you nieyah and your salaah isn’t accepted. and thats to both men and women.
Because Allah alone knows how many go to the mosque, to show their face. and when you do actually muster up the energy to go to the mosque, at least be decently clad. Nothing as bad as see through scarves and tight jeans. Have respect not just for the mosque and what it stands for.
But the post negates any good intentions others may have. What if THIS Ramadaan was the month that brought you back into the Deen? What if your intentions were truly sincere?
Most importantly you detract from your own sawaab by looking down at “seasonal muslims”
If the article merely presented an experience, I would have had no problem with it, but it is extremely judgemental – and unnecessarily so. Statements like…
“The kind that are believers for 30 days of the year while for the remaining 335 they seem to be on a perpetual holiday from ibada.”
“Well, I had never seen HER in the masjid before either.”
…gives me the impression that the writer is somewhat proud. What gives anyone the authority to judge who is a believer and on which days – especially on the basis used in the piece?
I don’t think it is anyone’s place to sit back and criticise other muslim women for not attending congregational prayers regularly. Rather work on improving your relationship with your creator. You may not be much better than them- only He knows.
I echo Mash’s observations of the Somali community coming to the mosques as families. I am personally experiencing this in Durban, South Africa.
The women’s jamaah is made up of about 30-odd women every night, alhamdulillah. For SAn, particularly Dbn conversative crowds – I think that this is a good-sized women’s jamaah. Of this, 99% of the women are Somali ladies, with the majority of them bringing their daughters and babies with. It’s such a beautiful atmosphere to see the babies clad in their burkhas and the little girls trying their best to read as many rakaah as possible.
The best feeling is when Taraweeh is over and people leave the mosque – husbands meet their wives outside the mosque and walk back to their flats (it’s in Durban CBD), whilst others walk to their cars together given the area is quite unsafe. The kids are messing about and laughing amongst themselves and every night, this atmosphere is consistent. A blessed feeling after all praying together.
As many of you might know, Somali ladies wear long burkhas and adequately (more than adequately!) cover their satr. I do agree with Mohamed’s point of women being awarded the prerogative to pray in the mosque, or not. However, the maintenance of satr and adab when going to the mosque is essential. Being respectful in one’s dress (after all, we are communicating with Him and so being respectfully dressed anyway is necessary!), and not drawing attention to oneself with perfume and blingy accessories, etc. is necessary. Personally, I dont quite understand how women who attire themselves extraordinarily and with such skimpy clothing etc. can ever feel comfortable whilst praying!
Anyway – as a Muslim lady having the opportunity to pray at the mosque vs home – it’s so much more moving to accompany my husband for prayer and to participate together in such a blessed act – to then pray in jamaah with women on a daily basis and form this ’silent bond’ with them over the month in worship, and to see toddlers and little girls being exposed to the beauty of worship during this month and see them being trained/disciplined on the adab of being in the mosque, of praying in Jamaah etc.. Surely God loves this…. !
Surely.
After all, a mosque needs to be reverted to a civic centre for the Muslim community (both men AND women).
@ Aasia – I see your point about women dressing modestly when they come to the mosque but perhaps we need to address the modesty issue as a whole and not just about when women come to mosque – even if ladies are not dressed appropriately for mosque the idea is that they should be encouraged to continue coming to mosque and then to encourage them to be modest too.
i dont think the author negates the intentions of the women who come to the mosque nor is the author being proud and looking down at them. I agree with Bilal – think the best of you sister/brother. Different people express what they see in different ways.
@ x – check Bilal’s post earlier!
>(An alternative phrase could be “Seasonal Muslims” – as used by Baba Ali in season 1 of his “Reminders” video blog: http://www.ummahfilms.com/season1.html. Another recent one is “30 DAY MUSALLEE” – used at http://killa.co.za/blog/?p=440).
All the same and just as elitist imo. Having said that I have big issues with Baba’s stuff anyway, so perhaps I’m just sensitive; I even have concerns when some repeatedly bang on clothing (and how it suddenly only becomes an issue once someone starts practising). But now we’re digressing so I’ll leave it there.
Back to the point, perhaps the biggest thing stopping women from coming to the mosque and it becoming a community centre, is the insistence on segregation and a partition of resources? In my opinion the “co-ed” mosques which work the best have a free flow format (where both genders share the same hall or prayer space, just at a distance) – this solves the practical space problem by allowing the mosque to reconfigure itself depending on the need and also might increase the level of community/involvement by all parties. Of course there are certain issues (of fitna for example) but that’s something that isn’t necessarily addressed via strict segregation either.
@ Bilal
Kindly reread my post. Nowhere do I say that the writer has pride.
However like x mentioned, I do feel that the writer is being judgmental. To quote the writer:
“The kind that are believers for 30 days of the year while for the remaining 335 they seem to be on a perpetual holiday from ibada.”
Fair enough, we are supposed to think the best of our brothers and sisters but when the fellow sister in question herself makes such a statement, I have all the right to ask exactly how is she qualified to say something like that? Is she in the homes of those “Ramadan Muslimahs” for the rest of the 335 days to really know that they do not perform ibadah? Suddenly by attending mosque only, does one’s ibadah become “accepted”?
And shouldn’t the writer herself be thinking the best of her sisters as well? That they are actually taking the time to attend the mosque during the holy month of Ramadan?
I don’t think anyone is disputing that women should be allowed to perform salaah at the masjid. Rather it is the judgemental tone of the author of the article that is irking people. To believe that one is a better muslimah for performing salaah in the masjid as opposed to reading at home is wrong. In fact there are numerous hadith mentioning that there is a greater reward for women to read salaah at home. It is up to the individual to decide which they prefer as both are permissible.
Unfortunately the following paragraph from the article highlights exactly why many South African Ulema encourage women not to come to the masjid.
” People hung about everywhere; some where just standing around waiting for the adhan to go while they laughed away and brought their gossip up to date; others where somewhat moving into the masjid although if they walked any slower, they could have been moving backwards. yet others still where displaying various merchandise – scarves, tasbih’s, mussualas – and appeared to be attempting to barter it off to the laggards around them”
One can assume that the Ulema would rather not the masjid and its surroundings become a meeting place for fitnah. I can understand this point of view, even though I may not agree with it.
This was a good read but I have to disagree.
What I love about going to the mosque on EID is the fact the parking lot is crazy packed. Yes I see so many people I had never seen before. But the energy is absolutely positive. When you go to the mosque u shouldnt care what peoples intentions are. What u should care about are ur own intentions and why u are there. Looking at peoples fashion and what not. Why? Why should u look at someone elses clothes? And then nit pick at what they are wearing and what they shouldnt? it is no ones business. I myself being a convert am highly into fashion. I like wearing nice things and like to have nice abayas or hijabs or scarves. Should I stick to the same color code of black? Black is nice but it is ultimately depressing. I wear clothes that are nice for myself not to grab the attention of others or make myself better than anyone else. Again one should only be concern of their own intentions and not the intentions of others. I do agree with your friend in stating that Islam is the perfect religion given to imperfect human beings. Because when I converted I really held muslims on a high pedestal until I got to know them individually. It doesnt mean I would walk into the mosque and think negatively of others just because others didnt live up to my standards of what a muslim should be. We should all be thankful that Muslims are going to the mosque. That they are praying together. That even though its one day that they are there at least they are there. None of us are God. So none of us knows the intention of others nor should we judge the intentions of others.
Assalam Alaikum,
Ummmm…you know, perhaps there is some pride and arrogance in the author. Or it might just be frustration. Or perhaps she was just trying to be comical. One thing is for certain, so long as we are debating our issues and trying to find solutions for them rather than ignoring them, then we are moving in the right direction. Even if our hearts may not be so pure
Salma. You right. But as a whole alot of girls barely dress decently on most occasions. I just meant when going to the mosque, more care should be taken. Like Mohammed said. Reading at the mosque doesn’t make you a better muslimah. I just don’t believe any of us have a right to cast doubt or judge others. I know plenty of mosque horror stories. None which shall be repeated here.
Am I the only one that has been shocked by this expression (English is not my mothertongue, but saying of Allah swt big guy, is not respectful at all) or didn’nt I understand it well
“But I kept my big mouth shut; after all there is no point on having the big guy upstairs invalidate my fast just because I could not hold my tongue.”
Just wanted to +1 Suraya’s comment. Well said.
Just to point out that the authors experience of gossip and chattiness at the mosque is not universal and should not be used as an ‘I told you so’ by those who believe women cause fitna. I personally have never experienced that type of behaviour. On the contrary, last night the teenage boys standing outside the mosque I went to laughing while we prayed Salaah showed far less consideration or commitment than the young girls praying inside. So its not about gender, its behaviour. All women cannot be judged by the actions of a few.
on the topic of the post it self I pretty much agree with Zohra Sarwari and Suraya – I was far from a ‘good or practising Muslim’ (whatever that is) for most of my life and I would hate to think that I was being judged on the occasions I did go to the mosque, as Zohra says I make effort to never forget how I was and how I still am.
Far from perfect.
We have to accept that many people struggle with practice and yes many people do wait until Ramadan to attend the mosque but if these ’seasonal Muslims’ didn’t turn up would we all be reading pieces on the fact Muslims don’t even make the effort during the Holy month??
On the issue of women in Mosques I think it’s less to do with the mosque itself than their place in the community and as Shak stated if it’s simply being done to assert power then it’s rather pointless anyway.
In every case it’s a question of sincerity and intention we can only HOPE that the intention and sincerity of those us around is ‘correct’ we can never know, let’s all leave that to Allah.
I think the author is just pointing out, that ramadaan becomes a burden on those sisters who regularly attend the masjid. InshaAllah, we can all work together to make Ramadaan a month of blessing for everyone, by being more considerate of others. Soap or no soap